Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize