Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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