It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
