Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Randomize
