My hand turned me down
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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