I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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