i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
