is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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