why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I'm passing your future prison.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
