i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize