it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
