Screwed.edu
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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