You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
