will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
how does that bad decision feel?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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