you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
