i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
