Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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