puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I need a burrito and a hug.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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