and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
