My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Randomize
