I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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