I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
