But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
