id be glad to
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize