he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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