worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
ok first of all what the fuck
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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