Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
All the doctor said was why
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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