I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
