Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
