Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
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