It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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