oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
