I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize