Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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