Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
This baby is an asshole
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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