i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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