The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
