Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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