i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
