I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
