Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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