I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
