spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
