i think my tv is drunk
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
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