i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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