I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
