He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
