Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
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