This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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