So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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